These are the rules. Write ‘em down … print ‘em out … tattoo ‘em on your arm. Just DON’T break ‘em!!

• Stores are not allowed to display Christmas stuff until AFTER at least Halloween, preferably not until after Thanksgiving.
  – It is just WRONG to find Halloween and Christmas stuff in a store by each other.
• Christmas decorations are not to be put up until after Thanksgiving.
  – They put decorations up downtown this week. It is TOO early for that.
• Christmas music cannot be played until after Thanksgiving.
  – Every time I turned my radio to 104.7FM today, I heard a Christmas song. WTF?!?!
• It cannot snow until after my birthday. It would be better if it didn’t snow until Christmas Eve, but definitely NOT before my birthday.
  – I mean … if it can’t wait until after Nov. 14 to snow, I need to move south. LOL

If you break any of these rules … you don’t wanna know what will happen. :G-razz3:

The following is a public service* to all of my fellow rednecks. Enjoy.

Redneck Pick-up Lines

1) Did you fart, cause you blew me away.

2) Are your parents retarded, ’cause you sure are special.

3) My Love for you is like diarrhea … I can’t hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card, ’cause I’d like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in them.

6) If you and I were Squirrels, I’d store my nuts in your hole.

7) You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

8) Exchange:
Man - “Fat Penguin!”
Woman - “WHAT?”
Man - “I just wanted to say something that would break the ice.”

9) I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock.

10) I can’t find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

11) Your eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

12) If you’re going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.

13) Your face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

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